BACK

im back.

i had no mood to blog about my life as i had been handling a small misunderstanding in my relationship.

but that was last week.

last thursday to be exact.

well, i will make it brief as i dont want to get too personal about it in case my guy happens to read this blog of mine.

haha.

it was like that - all because of his damned phone which aint workin properly.

i kept on texting and calling him but no response.

later i bumped into him at the library and waved to him.

however he seemed uneasy in front of his friends.

the best part was that bee and chunmeng had witnessed the saddest and shocking event.

which was that my guy simply didnt stay on to talk with me and went off with his peeps instead.

i thought to myself, how could he simply ignore my smses and calls and act as if nothing had happened?

so i just went after him and saw him chatting so happily with them, which made me sad.

but i still gathered my courage and touched his arm behind.

then he was shocked then i signed "five mins can?"

one of his peeps saw me and stood to wait for him.

but he told one of his friends to leave without him and the group left.

i could sense his embarrassment with my presence in front of them.

sigh, i was really very miserable then.

silence.

we just walked back to studio and i left with him early afternoon.

i questioned him just to find out that he didnt even know that i had been texting and calling him beforehand.

even when he was in the library.

no wonder he acted ignorant - he didnt know i had wanted to go home with him.

it was only an misunderstanding.

however i still feel kind of heavy in my heart.

just imagine - he can really talk with them freely without SIGNING.

perhaps im being too sensitive but i beg to differ.

for he had mentioned in a moment of anger that he didnt like to sign to me anymore.

that really hurt me deep inside.

does signing to me really bother him so much?

please.

im deaf and you gotta accept that!

what's bloody fuck wrong with signing?

i know you dont mind it but sorry i still cant forget that day when u showed your embarassment with my presence in front of your bloody fuck friends.

im sorry to criticise them but hey who is more important to you, me or them?

although you apologised for it, it can never seal up the cut u had given to my heart.

i really get so sad just thinking about it.

perhaps you aint mature yet.

u've yet to experience the reality in ns.

i dare bet with my life that you will change after ns.

just dont bet with me cos you will lose for sure.

just get ready for a change-over!